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Fountain of Wisdom: Law Enforcement
© 2003 Stephen D. Glass
All Rights Reserved.
Americans' favorite inspirational, motivational funny sayings, phrases and quotes from policemen, deputies and other law enforcement officers from all over the U.S.

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Halt, or I will release my dog!
Hands above your head!
Happiness is a warm gun.
Have a good day!
Have you hugged a tree today?
He who dies with the most toys WINS.
He who knows that he needs to know more, already knows what he needs to know most.
He who lives without discipline dies without honor.
Hear everything, say nothing, because what comes around goes around!
Help is just a phone call away.
Help me. I've fallen and I can't get up.
Hereís your sign!
Heroes by chanceÖGuardians by choice.
Hey Bud, what's your problem?
Hey, girls. Keep your .38's concealed.
Hey, let's be careful out there!
High station in life is earned by the gallantry with which appalling experiences are survived with grace.
History repeats itself all too often.
Honest, Ossifer. I've only had one beer.
Honesty and hard work should count for something.
Honesty goes far in life...with your friends, employers, family, and most importantly yourself!
Honor and respect are earned, not given.
HONOR, COURAGE, COMMITMENT
Hook 'em and book 'em, and donít look back!
How you win a game shows something of your character, but how you lose it shows all of it.
"I believe you are being a bit economical with the truth." --- Mark Twain
I am a member of the largest gang in America!
I am not above the law, nor below the law. My job is to enforce the law, not make the law.
I am not going to ask you if you just said what I think you just said, because I know itís what you just said.
I am the best!
I can't wait until youíre old enough to get your own welfare.
I cannot be a friend to others unless I can be a friend to myself.
I cuff 'em. You stuff Ďem.
I didnít do it.
I donít care if you are responding from just east of hell. JUST GO!
I don't know how that happened. I wasn't even there!
I don't like doughnuts.
I don't own the road. I am just the guy they pay to run it.
I don't write your ticket. Your attitude writes it for you.
I exist to serve!
I fight what you fear!
I hate the media.
I have cuffs!
I have seen the future, and I can't afford it!
I have warrants. You will have to come with me.
I just do what the voices in my head tell me to do.
I know it's here somewhere!
I may not agree with what you say, but I will die defending your right to say it. --- Voltaire
I put on my shoes but remembered far too late my secret Spam stash.
Iíd rather be judged by 12 than carried by 6.
Iíd rather have the opportunity to fail than not to have the opportunity!
I see the glass as half-full.
I should have been a fireman.
I sleep well at night. Do you?
I swear, upon the altar of God, eternal hostility against all forms of tyranny over the mind of man.
I think you are opinionated, only when your opinion is different than mine.
I think. Therefore, I am.
I took the road less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.
  I understand that you say you were only doing 80 mph in a 60 mph zone even though I clocked you
at 93mph, but what is your point, sir. Please sign the ticket here.
I used to be snow white, but I drifted.
I want a woman who would jump back onto the ship for me.
I want nothing. I fear no man. I am free!
I want to know everything. Tell me more, more, more!
I want to play with things that go tick tock and, hopefully, never go BOOM!
I was going to take up jogging, but the constant bouncing kept foaming my beer.
I will find your trace.
I will never grow old.
I will not leave you comfortless.
I will strike down with great vengeance those who seek to poison my brother.
I would be happy looking back on my life, if I died to save another.
  I would rather be a meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet. The proper function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. I shall use my time!
I would rather go nowhere with you than to go somewhere without you.
I'd love to have a battle of wits with you, but I never fight an unarmed person!
Iíd rather be fishing.
Iíll be there in a minute, Honey.
Iíll get back with you on that.
I'll get to it in my own good time.
Iíll make a deal with you. You donít mess with me, and I wonít kill you. Any questions?
I'll never do "THAT" again!
I'll think about that tomorrow.
I'm a big teddy bear.
Iím a bomb tech. If you see me running, try and keep up. 
I'm a cop who rides a bicycle in the desert. Got any water?
I'm a professional baby-sitter for the legally challenged!
I'm an old fashioned guy in a world that is not.
I'm as happy as a "DEAD PIG" in the sunshine, and grinning like a Jackass eating saw briars.
I'm finer than a frog hair split 28 ways.
I'm frisking you for your pleasure and my safety.
I'm going to live until I die!
Iím here to do two thingsÖdrink beer and kick ass. Iím all out of beer.
I'm just here to chew bubble gum and kick ass. I'm all out of bubblegum!
Iím listening. Now talk.
I'm not a meter maid.
"I'm not a smart man, but I know what love is". --- Forest Gump
Iím the one in your rear view mirror.
Iím your personal "eye in the sky".
Iíve already got a guilty conscience. Might as well have the money, too.
I've never met a crook that fished.

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****Fountain of Wisdom collection of favorite sayings and quotes
| Attorneys | Counselors | Engineers | FireFighters | Law Enforcement | Military | Ministers | Mothers | Nurses |
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Retired Persons | Sales People | Teachers | The Classics |

Collective Wisdom collection of favorite sayings and quotes
| Always | As a Teacher... | Be All You Can Be! | The Best Questions | Don't... | Happy Birthday! | Hey, Stupid | IF... | Love |
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My GOD | Never | One of a Kind | Only You! | Power of Words | Tell Me About "IT" | That's Life! | Walk the Walk |

More Collections of favorite sayings and quotes
| Church Marquees | The Morals of Aesop's Fables | Pledge To America | Tom Swifties |

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